seems i've always got something on the tip of my tongue.    ©

Sunday, April 23, 2006

saturday night was all right -- and bondage

the guy and i have had some space this week. not deliberately, it's just happened. he's still recuping from his injury, a severely broken leg, but decided to push things too hard this week, and wound up too fatigued. i'm a little concerned, but i know it's only two more weeks-ish, and then things will begin a move towards normalcy.

space is good. it keeps things healthy. absence/heart/fonder, and all that. there's something nice, sometimes, about waking up alone on a sunday. i'd rather i wasn't alone, but it is what it is, and i'll have a great day regardless. a great breakfast will be followed by a long sunny bike ride, and an afternoon of writing and editing.

the plan last night, though, was initially that the guy would come home with me after our first big night on the town since our first date... (i was sick, then he broke his leg. couch time, baby.) but last night, i had plans. i was going to introduce loverboy to my idea of bondage. i schemed and gathered the necessities. i love an orchestrated evening.

BONDAGE is one of those things that is overwhelmingly portrayed as a core activity. meaning, those who speak of it are those who are very much the "lifestylers." i know there are a lot of folks out there who perceive bondage as being only something done with dog-collars, whips, yada, yada. no, not necessarily. bondage can be one of the most intimate things you can do for a lover. bondage is the exercise of trust and generosity. romantic, passionate, hot, and fucking mind-blowing some nights, that's what it is, what it can be. it can venture to edgy, if you want it to, but it doesn't have to go there.

there are easier, less intimidating ways to introduce yourself to bondage than what the typical bondage practitioner might exhibit.

unfortunately, the guy wasn't well last night, having fallen and hurt his "good" leg yesterday, so he went home solo for a night of good sleep. i endorse that move, since i'm not some needy chick who has to have the guy around to know he's into me. 'cos, like, i know he's into me. quite.

but the point is, until i have that night of first-timer bondage with the guy, i won't be posting my "vanilla-lovers introduction to bondage," something i've already begun writing. i'm not sure i'll ever foray into the hardcore bondage lifestyle, but i'll never judge it, either. i do, however, think a lot of lovers are short-changing themselves by denying themselves the experience of either tying up and appeasing their lover, or letting their lover do the same to them.

i, for one, can't wait to have that experience with my guy. soon. quite. he knows it looms, and now i've begun building it up, "so, i've got caramel sauce..." because i'm getting a little impatient. and though i may have compromised patience, my intelligence, i assure you, is in full function. i may want to do this here, now, immediately, but i don't want my efforts wasted on my guy when he's too tired to enjoy them. i'd rather wait and have a better experience, so that's the plan. quality always trumps quantity in my world. maybe next weekend, and then, you kids can learn about bondage MY way.